Saturday, August 30, 2008

the sms..

wrote on 22 august..never post..
sms between me n princess on 17 August to 19 August..


princess (hr ahad mlm) = "u..beli apa k org kawen 2?awat xcall celcm?mxis xdak line kat umah i"


no msg reply from me..


My msg on sunday = “u,da blk sni ke”


Dia xreply


Harini… ( 19/08/08 )


Princess = I blk khamis ni


Me = lamanya holiday.


Princess = huhu..jgn jeles na..kames bru blik


Me = I kat kdah jugak.watpa nk jeles..


Princess = huh?u!xgtau pun?owh lupa..i da xpenting pun


Me = erk?i penting ke bg u?


Princess = fine!


Me = I bru smpi ja..brtolak pg td..parent I pi ambik.bkn xnk bgtau..i xrasa u nk tawu pun..huhu..


Princess = huh..bgtau pun dak..da pandai2 read my mind..i noe u try to avoid me…!


Me = u miss me?


Princess = ya..dfinitely..


Me = how r u?


Princess = ces..bru nk tnya?hmm,xsht..nk dmam dah ni,pnat kenduri..xckup tidoq


Kan aku kata..aku tak contact dia mesti dia demam..


Me = I da agak..minum air byk sket..u mls minum air dmam la..pnas kan skang..


Princess = 2 ja taw advice..balik kl bila?


Me= nnt advc lbh2 u kata I mak nenek..hr sabtu kut blk.u kat mana ni?


Princess = kat pokok sena,dats y txt u pkai maxis..huhu..ingt nak ajak balik dgn I kames ni..i da amek tiket


Me = xmau blk hari sabtu?


Princess = da amik tiket la..



Me = burn la..i buy u new 1..Saturday


Princess = call me..



i called her...damn i miss to hear her voice...lma jugak aku tak tepon..since i read her shout out on friendster...i dunno y..aku takde lah mcm berkecai hati sgt sebb aku mmg da agak ni yang akan jadi....huhu..tapi agak rasa mcm terkejut..mcm rasa hati aku ckp kat diri aku..ary..skang da terang2 jawapan dia utk semua soalan ko..udah2 le tuh..berenti...so..aku cuba utk berenti buat semua benda yang aku da biasa buat...yerlah..aku takut kalau aku still mcm dulu..aku takot aku asyik berharap..aku takut aku makin syg dia sampai tak bleh kontrol...aku takut aku jugak yang sakit nanti..so dari aku boleh terima semuanya sekarang atau keadaan jadi makin worst..better i try to stop..juz let her happy..lagipun aku sendiri tak sanggup nak heret dia masuk dunia mcm aku..biarlah aku saja yang syg dia..so tak bertambah dosa yang sedia ada kan..huhu...at least i will never loose her...like i loose my past....

dia tak dpt balik dgn aku sebb da janji dgn kekash ati dia.its ok..lagipun aku bz bangat..takleh nak balik sama dgn dia hari khamis...rasanya agak lama aku tak jumpa dia..hurm..almost 2 week..last jumpa before aku pegi langkawi 31hb bulan lepas...then lepas balik langkawi ada gak dia turun shah alam..tapi aku sengaja tanak jumpa...huhu..siap buat instruction lagik utk dia pegi amik choc...haha..sory u..time tue i rasa mcm xredi sgt nk jumpa u masa i duk pk2 lagik pasal shout u..tak marah pun..cuma..mayb nak buat suprise kat u..wif da word..da gift..da card i make by my self...u must be beautiiful wearing da pario..kan?...huhu..da le plan nak jumpa kat kedah pun tak dpt jumpa..aiseh...tuh la ary..sapa suh masa dia bleh jumpa ko..ko lari..kanpadan muka..takleh jumpa dia..haha...

anyway princess...i miss u so much...

finally


wrote on 11/8..fs blog..

Finally,da shout out really give me da answer..wif my song on da profile..i wonder y u put da song i gve u on ur profile..u bg dia pulak ke lagu tue?n ur shout out.. it’s like da answer for all da question on dat song..hurm..im not hurts…I think so..becoz I dun need sympathy by anybody..n I dun need u to be wif me without u really luv me..plus now i know u dun want me..i da redi pun..sorry sebb tak paham2 lagi maksud u..n stop ckp u syg i.. now I wish.. u will be happy wif da decision..at least finally u gave me da answer kan…walaupun cuma melalui shout out je n bukan secara terus.. but hei.. thanks for it…takda la I tertanya tanya lagi..u wake me up from the fake dream… maybe it’s time to stop dreaming..so now..all i hope, he will luv u like I do..hope he always try to give ur own time n not pushing u like I do..try to understand everything bout u…try to listen everythin u try to say..juz like I do..will try to make u happy..try to give ur own private space.. like I try to do..try to give u surprise n make u smile like I do..n think about u every morning like I do…n threat u like no other princess he ever hve in life..juz like i want to do...so I wont worry bout u anymore…I learn if I luv u..i need to let u go…n believe me…I tried …even finally I found the one i've given my heart to is only to find that one won't give their heart to me too…I wish u happy…and please..make me smile by watching u happy… mcm u kata.

" i berhak jugak nk syg sapa2 i nak"

then..i xkan rampas hak u tue...

a day wif her...

wrote on 19/7/08..friendster blog..

smlm..aku start idup aku dgn mejejakkan kaki dekat gym.. hehe.. masa tgh berurusan dekat counter..the counter gurl try to flirt wif me...kindda cute gurl..she want me to call her wana..she try to play a game wif me where she doesnt want to give the membershp kad back.. n aku sendiri tlupa nk mintak kad krdt aku balik sebb terbabit dgn game dia..hehe.. n u know wut..she call me about 10 minit later..


"ary..i wana kat counter tadi..."
"okey..wussup gurl..?"
"syg ur credit card wif me..later u come here ok.."

"ok.."

huhu...i hve my own cute gurl already...so naaa...not interested..sebb masa aku pg dptkan kad aku..dia de bg kertas dgn no phone dia..

"u taknak no phone i ke syg?"

"ya..sure..kalau u nak bagi..of coz i ambik"

apa le yg dia nampak kat aku ni..muka pun macam tembok pecah jerk..hehe...gemok..pendek...but i do tell her that she really look nice masa memula start berckp..huhu.. saja.. try to be nice wif other people kan..lgpun..saja je try skill.. haha...tp alih2 aku yg kena..xnak ahh..i hve the princess already..even she not mine...but... i dunno..coz i never hve the answer...

after a few hours..dok tunggang terbalik kat situ sambil dikelilingi wanita sexy dan jejaka bertubuh sasa..cewahhh... hehe..the princess finally sms me..then im ready to pick up her lepas mandi...so kuar dr gym..i try to find somethin to giv her...but takde benda pulak...plus da lambat giler da..so terus drive ke pandan indah..coz i need to fetch her there.. before dat i need to meet abang at de palma...tak sempat ckp pe pun dgn abg coz dia sebuk bangat n sempat bagi cek je...then driving blk until my dad call me utk mengadu.. haha...(sometime i wonder..i am his daughter or his frends..?)like usual..ada problem ja kalau kat opis..aku le tempat dia ngadu..even gado dgn mak sikit2..so now aku jauh dimata..dlm phone pun ok..tapi masalahnya aku tgh driving didlm kesibukkan kota..yg akhirnya membawa aku sesat entah kemana-mana..tapi xpalah..kang dicop anak derhaka pulak.. so dgrlah dia duk ngadu sambil driving sebelah tangan... :P

then da jumpa tuan putri tuh..kitorg pegi alamanda... afta tersalah jalan byk kali..hehe..wut da hell in my mind hah sampai tersesat... entahlah..egege...kat alamanda kitorg puas keliling cari gsc..dak kecik tue nk tgk batman...skali sampai dpan kaunter tiket.. batman start pukul 330..time kami kat situ pun dah 330pm..so kitorg decide nk tgk tmpat lain..b4 dat jenjln ..dia nk cr baju kemeja..ada satu baju tuh comel giler bila dia pakai..tp dia tanak beli plak..mula ingat nk belikan utk dia tp sj taknak ckp lagi sebb dia asyik kata baju tuh cantik tp ada benda tak kena...so biarkan je dulu.. masa dia gi toilet de gak aku melilau cr teddy..tapi mcm tak comel je teddy bear yg aku jumpa harituh..haha..i need to giv her somethng..sebb last kuar aku de bg bunga n choc... bukan nak manjakan dia ke hape..but i luv to see her smile... dats all..salah ke?..huhu...

then lepas a few shop kitorg masuk..finally we decide to go to pizza n watch the muvi on 6.30...coz rasa mcm alang2 dah kat situ..tgk jelah muvi disitu...masa tgh makan..mak ayien call..my ex mother in law..hehe..dia tanya kabar aku n tanya bila aku nk gi rumah dia..huhu..dia taktawu ke aku dah lama tak jumpa anak dia..betapa sygnya mak dia dkat aku smpi suh aku panggel dia mak...tp org ckp..kalau ada masalah dgn anak..jgn babitkan mak bapak..hormat org tua..betul tak..so lepas ckp manis2 sket n janji nk pegi umah dia nanti..baru dia nak letak....hurm..janji mesti dikotakan..so kenalah aku pegi jugak umah dia..xpelah..mak aku tak penah ajar suh xhormat org tua kan...

afta muvi kitorg da nak gerak balik tetiba de satu kedai ni.. dia nk masuk..macam biasa layan tuan putri ni pilih baju..aku decide nak bayarkan baju dia tuh...i wont tell her..sebb pk masa dkat counter terus aku nk bayar..tapi bila tgk dia duk terkial2 mcm mak nenek(haha) nak pilih yg mana..terus aku ckp..

"juz take dat..i pay for u...both shirt look nice on u..."


dia taknak aku byr..but still i win..hehehe..syg...if this will make u happy..y not i spend some money for u kan...duit boleh cari..but da happiness i see on ur face not easy to find...especially when the time i hve to spend wif u juz for bout a few hours..then i dunno when can i see ur face again.. watching u talking n smiling...
on our way back to send her home..we have a serius conversation. .hurm..i ask her..y she wrote me a msg sound like she jealous last day...n the answer..yes..she jealous bout somethin i wrote at here...gud to know dat..but yet..i still wanna know the answer for others..like a simple question like this..

do you luv me too?..
if yes more then a fren or wut...
do u care if i hve someone else...if u care..why?
when u wif me..all thing u said r do utk jaga hati or u really mean dat...
r u juz wif me and try to having fun juz for jaga hati...?
or i juz a place for u to have fun...
did i really make u feel special or i juz like other guys around u?
i know..a relationship like us..takkan kemana...i know kita tak bleh kawen pun...i know u dun wanna us to be like me n my ex..break off and lose da frendship..i know u dun wanna be like my frend..getting hurt when da girl want to be wif guys...i know when u said..u tanak dgn i sebb nak jaga hati...but still..i juz wanna know..apa yg u rasa..siapa yang u nak... so enough already..i juz want to hear dat..if u r mine or not... takde relationship pun takpe...but at least i know wut u feel..coz i know finally u will married wif man kan..mayb i pun akan kawen..but still..i juz wanted to know..how do u feel bout me..then..i will stop askin..stop dreaming..n maybe try to giv da luv to others who willing to admit dat im hers...but still..even i manage to do dat...my princess only u...i cant changes dat...mayb u r beautiful... but dats not wut i see inside u...so jgn pk i suka u sebb u cantik..i luv u becoz of u.. coz u r different...coz u r the princess..susah sebenarnya nk ckp knapa i kata u lain..susah sebenarnya nk ckp kenapa i panggil u princess..tp for me still ..u r the princess...

i tau byk org suka u..mayb if we have the "relation" i will get jealous or wut so ever dgn org2 yg dlm wish list u...but i still cannot change the fact dat..a lot of people also like u..kita tak boleh buat org tak suka kita..lagipun perkara yg cantik mesti byk org suka..mayb its not bout cantik fizikal..but the beauty of urself..ur style..n seperti biasa seorang tuan putri mesti byk rakyat jelata yg suka dan admirer..kan..i think even guys who win ur heart also will face the same things... so i dun really bother bout dat..i already meet someone like dat before..so i know how to handle the situation..but now.. i juz wanna know..dat u r mine or not...if u r mine then i wont try to hve someone else...only be as urs...

wut ever pun princess..gud luck wif dat boy..i know u like him..i know u cares bout him...i do get jealous when i see how u really care about him..but i know u deserve to get better...i always be wif u no matter wut..im not pretending dat im happy for u...coz i know my self better..easy to get hurt n easy to cure..huhu..lagipun mencintai tak semstinya memiliki..kan...so maybe diz is wut i should faced..for ur happiness...n for my happinest..when i see ur face wif the truly smile n no any fake dat u created...to see ur eyes without tears...really make me feel better...really make me feel gud...coz my princess finally happy wif the right prince...finally dia da jumpa tuan punya tulang rusuk...

but..still i do hope...if i hve a chance to be urs before u get married wif the right guys.. dats would be the last special gift i ever wish in my life for now...even finally we will get hurt...i know..its hurt but still we hve a great moment we shared together,kan...or mayb..masing2 takkan sakit pun..sebb da readi..da admit benda tuh akan jadi...juz ask urself wut u want...don give other people to much hope...how bout urs..coz finally u also can get hurt when other people hurt becoz of ur hope...i dun want u to feel dat...i tau u pun tanak kan..but if it will be ur choice..then..who the hell i am to ask for more from u...so..wut i can do now..try to make u happy..make u feel better...make u feel save...n be ur frend always...becoz dat wut i choose in my life rite now..afta i start calling u..princess....

by da way..a great day for me last nite..thanks for spending ur golden time wif me..n u know wut..u r so cute last nite...hahaha.. even u kata u serabai..for me u look nice....:P

im sorry

wrote on 14/7/08...friendster blog

eargh...im juz doing a stupid mistake today...some unmatured things...aduh..seriusly i dun mean to do dat...but..maybe..because im juz an idiot..

princess...im sorry..i dun mean to make u feel unhappy or wut so ever..i juz feel like..i dun ever exist in ur life...i juz want to meet u..but ended up i know u wif other guy..i know dats ur rite..ur happy time..i dun deserve to share dat moment wif u..u bukan ada pape dgn i..i know dat..but when u r not returning my msg askin u to go out..then i call u n tell me u hangin up wif others..i juz feel like..sapalah i..kan...u even bother to reply my msg juz to say..


"sorry..i xbleh kuar dgn u...." or may be "i xjd pegi s.alam"

simple je..susah ke.....juz a simple msg..i tgk msg org lain senang je u reply...but me..hurmm....i know tak susah kalau u ingat..but..like i say..im not exist kan... bukan i nk marah pun..i takkan marah..becoz i know dat u ok..i know dat u tgh happy at da moment..so i wont disturd..takkan i nk kacau org yg i janji akan buat dia happy tgh hve fun...i dun need to worried bout u if i know u ok..i dun need to berharap...how could i tell u miss u..becoz i dun think u will understand...i want to make u happy..dat y i dun ask anything from u..dats y i dun ask u to luv me back..dats y i dun even ask u to be wif me...penah ke i tanya atau propose u..takkan..i cuma bagitawu wut i feel bout u..tapi i tak penah pun tanya atau mintak u to be my luv one..sebb i tawu..gurl like u hve a lot of choice...mustahil u akan terima i...so..i takkan tanya selagi i tak nampak isyarat dr u..so dun worry...

u tau tak i willing to do anything for u kan...anythin i could...juz to make u happy...juz to make my princess feel happy n save...so please...i hope u will forgive me wut ever i did or say today...i will not disturd u again...i try to...if it will make u happy...but wut i say before..dat u r the only princess..is true..i never try to call other people wif the name..i nver have other princess i my heart..i never hve some1 else pun..but i know..u r the one who hve some1 else kan...mayb u yg tak sedar..so i dun hve the place in anywhere in ur heart...so..no need to feel sorry or feel bad...wut 4 kan..its all bout feeling...ni bukan malay typical drama yg nak nangis or say sorry for sumthin u tak salah..i mean kalau u ada some1 else pun..bukan salah u..like i said it about feeling..u never promise me anythin..lagipun..im not a man..but i do care bout u more then they can do..so..xpelah..i try to take dat..try to face dat..dah besar..bukan baby lagi..juz hve ur fun n be happy,princess...everybody deserve to be happy..including u...tuhan tu maha kaya..1 hari u akan jumpa org yg bebetul syg u...cuma..jgn buat sesuatu benda tuh sebb kesiankan org..dun..it will hurt somebody oneday...remember wut u give u will get back..so..do wut u think n ur heart said...ok...dun make a mistake dat u will regret oneday..if u think u xnak..say dat..tau..i always be there if u need me...juz press my number n i will try to be wif u if u need something...if u wan to see me....if u want to accept me which im not pushing u to do...juz dun feel sory for me..i dun like dat...dat make me feel like a looser....again n again....

n dun forget...minum air byk2....tkt demam nanti..nanti tekak sakit..tau...take care urself..sorry no morning msg n call today..i need time for myself...to accept everythin...i will do my rutin back afta everythin back to da normal...coz i promise u..i never stop taking care bout u...for me..u r the princess like no other princess in this world...sorry for everything...n thanks for let me be ur frends........dat the best gift i ever had in my life..to see ur smile n touch ur hair n ur face...to be there when u sad..i will remember dat moment for the rest of my life...thanks again....for let me call u..princess.....

Monday, August 25, 2008

i wrote this on 8/7/08 ..



Princess?..ya princess but not princess...i mean..dia bukan tuan puteri berdarah keturunan raja but for me she is the princess.. hurm..i luv to call her princess..n she a really nice gurl actually..talktive..active.. hardworking.. manja..sometime noti.. degil giler.. look hepi n cheerful..but the thing is i do like her not becoz shes beautiful..but it becoz i know shes special inside...from the 1st time i saw her..i know she different...mcm sebaris lirik lagu ni...

"She keeps the secrets in her eyes,
She wraps the truth inside her lies...."

lastnite..im takin her for dinner..ambik dia dkt opis around 5pm mcm tuh then terus pegi ampang park... giving her a rose n choc.. again?..ya again..since i know she luv it...then kitorg pegi ampang park...aku ckp nk bwk dia pegi makan kat kedai mamak dekat ampang park tuh...sje je buat mcm betul aku nk pegi kedai mamak disitu...sebb bila aku ckp mcm tuh dia mcm buat muka tak kesah..hehe(tapi taktau le dlm ati dia)..so kitorg pegi mkn dekat tmpt fav aku kat situ..dimana tempatnya bernama cozy corner..nice n good place to rilex while enjoying ur food...but da most important is..kind da fun to see her sincere face talking non stop!hahaaha...
when i be there...i juz keep listening wut ever she talk..aku tawu bila aku buat mcm tuh..it will help her release some emo...bside i do luv to hear n see her face when she talk...her cute face sometime explain everything about her...dats my princess...the only princess i hve..i know she look happy but inside...nobody knows..so im trying to let her share wif me wut ever things inside her heart...and sorry..i da buat u menangis mlm tue...but u know wut.. i do luv to be there n listen while watching ur face...n by da way..she is the one who i luv to say morning everyday...the one dat make me feel human again...the one who i luv to hear her voice..n the one who i willing to do anything to make her happy..the one who i care rite now like no other princess in my life..n the one who always be my princess n always be the only princess...


She opens up just like a rose to me,
When she's close to me
Anything she asked me to, I would
I'm helpless when she smiles"

n princess.. i'm yours.......
hye..im new here..try to post wut ever i post on fs blog to here..especially sumthin rel€ated wif da princess..its time to changes rite...