Sunday, October 26, 2008

26.10.08..12.30 am...

hurm..apa nak ckp yer...huhu.....ada openhouse kat umah...so aku ambik ksempatan tuh utk tanya apa jawapan dia..da answer is yes...answer for my question for her being my gurl..which i tot it a "no" and blabla..agak terkejut sebb dia terima..sebb aku dah penah kena reject byk kali..huhu..tapi kali ni je aku propose dia bebetul...n bebtul bagi dia masa pk..hope tuh bukan jawapn utk jaga hati aku ni..dimana aku tanya dia byk kali..r u serious..coz now u r entering senget world...n she said she dun wanna loose me..n yes..then in front of all my fren..i as her to say it again..so that they all are my witness that now me n her are officially couple..huhu..im not single anymore..i dunno wut to say..juz a big thank her...sebb aku tak payah tunggu2 lagi jawpan tuh..n i tried to make it for us..try make all my promises done...even aku tawu apa yg bakal lalui..its a risk..yes i know dat..but its an advanture to me..huhu..aku h habis tak bleh..then..stop la..sebb skang dah clear status kitorg apa...n walaupun mcm tuh..still da truth is..my gf has bf..huhu..xpelah..dgn aku pun bukan dia leh kawen..terima jelah dgn redha..

n for my syg..thanks a lot for dat..promise i never hurt u..n thanks for da kiss..i will remember this day whole of my life....i luv u...

Thursday, October 16, 2008

my word to u...




Smlm..chat dgn dia lepas berapa hari tak chat...damn..aku mmg tak bleh tahan dr tegur dia..aku dah cuba mcm2 utk taknak ganggu dia..siap uninstall ym lagik..tapi tetap tak bleh tahan diri aku dr cari dia..y?..pasai pa ary..tak bleh ka biaq dia sat sehari dua..biaq dia pikiaq…biaq dia biasa xda hang dlm hidup dia…biaq hang sendiri biasa takdak dia dlm idup hang..

aku perasan dia mcm nak elak dr aku lately..haritu aku call pun tak berangkat.. hurmm.. entahlah perasan aku sendiri ka hapa..tapi aku rasa its bout time to make everything clear kan..dari aku terus meletakkan dia sebagai priority aku..sedangkan aku ni cuma option utk dia je..better aku clearkan status aku dlm hidup dia..takderlah aku mcm berharap terlampau sgt..i tawu u..finally i akan sakit jugak..in fact skarang pun i da sakit..sebb xdpt dgr suara u..tak dpt jumpa u…kapel ke..tak kapel ke..tetap sakit..Cuma sakit sekarang atau suatu masa nanti..sebb walaupun kita takda apa2..kita dah lebih dr mcm kawan kan..betul tak..cuba u pk sendiri..i tak payah ckp apa yg menunjukkan kita ni lebih dr kawan...sebb kita je yg tawu..sebb kita berdua je yg habiskan masa berdua..so kalau u anggap i dgn u kawan sahaja..then y u give me a hope wif ur luv word n cares... y u say I luv u when u dun hve mean it… kenapa pujuk i masa i tgh marah dan merajuk dgn u..kenapa u nak jeles masa i kuar dgn org lain...kenapa u ckp u syg i..sedangkan u takde maksud macam tuh..or i just a place for u to have fun..to get attention when ur bf not been around u...then masa tuh baru u syg i..afta dat..lepas u dah dpt perhtian dari org lain yg u suka..u biarkan i mcm nie..u biarkan i yg dah biasa u manja2 bila u ada dgn i...fair ke mcm tue?harini sayang i..esok syg org lain..ok..


u..tak cukup ke apa yang i buat utk tunjuk betapa bermaknanya u bg i..tak cukup ke i tunjuk mcm mana i syg u..tak cukup ke I amik berat pasal u slama nie…tak tunjuk ke rasa hormat dgn privasi u yg i tunjuk..tak cukup ke apa yang i dah buat utk u...i tak pernah buat apa pun yg boleh menjatuhkan maruah u walaupun ada je peluang utk i buat kalau i mcm tue..i tau..u takut..kalau nanti kita dah kapel..i akan buat semua tue..i bukan mcm tue ok..i bukan org yg mcm tue..i bukan org yg paksa org lain buat benda yg org taknak buat..yes..everything will be different, will change..tuh sebb i ckp..bagitau i apa yang ganggu pkran u..apa yang buat u takut..share everythin wif me..coz im also ur frend ok..u pernah ckp i yg paling close dgn u..then..y not gimme a chance to share wif u wut u think...what make u worried..then we tried to figured it out..try to find a best solution for us..u can juz tell me..what I can do n don’t…I know u xpernah involve close sgt dgn pengkid..then let Tanya I apa yg u nak tawu..i jwp apa yg mampu..kalau taknak Tanya I pun..u ada mas kan..she also ur frend..remember dat..

apsal i nak sgt kapel dgn u?...i tak takut ke ilang u..?this my answer...i takut ilang u..yes..in fact kalau takde paper pun i tetap takut ilang u..n now..i dah rasa i ilang u..tp still i tetap nk u..sebb i rasa i takkan ilang u kalau i ada u...then kenapa i nk kapel..sebb i tak suka nak jeles tak bertempat..maksud i bila i ni bukan ada apa2 dgn u..i tak bleh nk jeles smua..apa hak I nak jeles mcm tuh..i takda hak nak merajuk dgn u pun..i tak boleh panggel u syg pun sebenarnya..i tak bleh bagitau kwn2 i yg u ni gf i..sedangkan diorg tgk kita mesra je dpan diorg..i just want to make it clear..what I am to u..a lover or just a frend…then kalau betul u tak bleh terima i..kalau betul u tak bleh kapel dgn i..its ok for me..at least I tawu..at least I akan berenti mengharap…at least I akan cuba utk tak syg u lebih dr seorg kwn..at least I akan blajar utk layan u mcm kawan saja…I takkan letak u sebagai priority dlm idup I lagi..then takdak sapa pun yg akan terasa ke hapa kalau salah sorg dari kita kuar dgn org lain..sebb kita cuma kwn..im not to important for u …thats the main reason why I propose u syg..to be my gurl..to make it clear dat u r mine…u pernah ckp..ur r my gurl..u luv me..remember dat?..then kalau u tak ingat…maknanya it juz a word for u without meaning…I tau u da biasa buat lelaki mcm ni…tapi tue lelaki syg..i ni takde kesan langsung ke dlm hidup u..kalau xda..xpalah..its ok to get hurt rite now before lama lagik..bila I dah bertambah tambah syg u…sakit sebb kita ingat dia kita yg punya tapi sebenarnya takda relationship pun…at least kalau ada relationship xda la I syok sendiri kan..ada gak anniversary yg I bleh ingat…this is all the reason y…jgn ingat I ajak u kapel sebb benda lain..u paham kan apa maksud i..thats ur own rite,I takkan buat benda yg org tak suka..lagipun yg tue kalau paksa xseronok jugak..even nk kiss u pun I tanya dulu..kalau org lain I rasa tak tanya dah…tuh menunjukkan I bukan mcm org lain..ok..i pilih u bukan sebb u cantik ke comel ke…I tau I takde la se hensem abid,abang u..dd..n I pun bukan lelaki..but da things is..i da start suka u sejak dari memula i jumpa u lagi..da way u talk..da way u smile..how u do ur things..kalau tak syg i..jgn ckp pun langsung yg u syg i…juz pk..kalau kita terus mcm ni..gettin close n bersyg2 tapi takder relationship… ttiba u jumpa I dgn org lain..berkepit bercium..u pk apa yg u akan rasa…at dat time..dun blame me kalau I jadi kejam sgt depan u…its not fair for u..not fair for dat gurl yg I berkepit tuh jugak..coz my heart not wif her pun..

rite now..pklah..kalau betul I ni tak pernah wujud pun dlm hati u..kalau betul dlm sehari u tak terpk pun i..kalau betullah u tak pernah rasa jeles pun bila tgk I dgn org lain.. kalau betullah u tak da rasa syg langsung dgn i..then its mean u dun luv me…syg sebagai kwn lain,u..then bagitau I,u syg I mcm mana….dun silent to long..coz im waiting…day by day..2 smua buat I rasa tak diperlukan..i juz want to take care of u..i juz want a permission to luv u…I juz want a right to call u my gurl..i dun even care bout u n ur bf..i know I will get jeles wut so ever..tp u pandai je pujuk I kan..tak pernah pun I majuk lama2 dgn u kan..kita takde apa2 pun bleh je I handle perasaan I bila u kuar dgn bf u..then y not afta this..sebb dr mula lagi I tau u ada bf..but still I sendiri nk amik risk nie..sebb kalau kita tak sakit..kalau kita tak buat salah..kalau kita tak pernah cuba untuk ambik risiko..kita takkan belajar apa2..kita takkan tawu apa kelemahan diri kita..bg I sama je..Cuma relationship kita dah clear…2 je..

I dah buang smua skandal i..juz to prove that i only want u..y?..sebb I taknak terus bagi harapan kat diorg sedangkan hati I dekat u.. I tau mcm mana perasaannya dpt harapan palsu..sakit u..u maybe tak pernah rasa..tp I pun taknak bagi u rasa tue…I promise I will luv u like no one ever luv u..i promise to not disturd ur privacy..i promise to luv u only..i promise to make sure u always feel happy..i promise to never let u drop ur tears on ur face…I promise to always be with u in sad n happy time..i promise to never let u feel alone..i promise honey bear..i never try to betray u…I promise to be only urs..n I promise to stay until u dun need me anymore…I tau..all this only a word I can easily type it here…but for me..its a word with a meaning..from buttom of my heart…

Lastly..i will disappear from ur life for a while..bkn sebb I tak syg u..but I need some time for my self to be strong..guess my life without u syg..i try to hang around n find something to do to juz to make sure my mind not thinking bout u..i dunno how bout u..maybe u tak teringat I pun kan..haha…who am I for u huh..? same question u ask me on ur birthday card for me..so please let me know ur decision ok..dun make me wait to long..no matter wut ur decision..i terima je..i promise I never blame u..ok..sebb ni semua berkenaan hati masing2..thanks for everythin..thanks for ur cares..thanks for da happinest u give me..i do appreciated dat.. so take care…..jgn lupa minum air..n

sayang...im sorry...coz im in luv wif u..

-ary-

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

harini..chat dgn dia lepas berapa hari tak chat...damn..aku mmg tak bleh tahan dr tegur dia..aku dah cuba mcm2..siap uninstall ym lagik..tapi tetap tak bleh tahan diri aku dr cari dia..y..pasai pa ary..tak bleh ka biaq dia sat sehari dua..biaq dia pikiaq...


aku perasan dia mcm nak elak dr aku lately..entahlah perasan aku sendiri ka hapa..tapi aku rasa its bout time to make everything clear kan..dari aku terus meletakkan dia sebagai priority aku..sedangkan aku ni cuma option utk dia je..better aku clearkan status aku dlm hidup dia..takderlah aku mcm berharap terlampau sgt..i tawu u..finally i akan sakit jugak..kapel ke..tak kapel ke..tetap sakit..sebb walaupun kita takda apa2..kita dah lebih dr mcm kawan kan..betul tak..cuba u pk sendiri..i tak payah ckp apa yg menunjukkan kita ni lebih dr kawan...sebb kita je yg tawu..sebb kita je yg ada masa tue..so kalau u anggap i dgn u kawan sahaja..then y u give me a hope wif ur luv word n cares... kenapa pujuk i masa i tgh marah dan merajuk dgn u..kenapa u nak jeles masa i kuar dgn org lain...kenapa u ckp u syg i..sedangkan u takde maksud macam tuh..or i just a place for u to have fun..to get attention when ur bf not been around u...


u..tak cukup ke apa yang i buat utk tunjuk betapa bermaknanya u bg i..tak cukup ke i tunjuk mcm mana i syg u..tak tunjuk ke rasa hormat dgn hak u yg i tunjuk..i tak pernah buat apa pun yg boleh menjatuhkan maruah u walaupun ada je peluang utk i buat..i tau..u takut..kalau nanti kita dah kapel..i akan buat semua tue..im not ok..i bukan org yg mcm tue..i bukan org yg paksa org lain buat benda yg org taknak buat..

Sunday, October 12, 2008

be my gurl...

syg...i choose u over her...i choose to luv u then her...i choose to be wif u over her..i choose to spend my time wif u then her..i choose to let her go not u...i choose to get hurt from u not from her..the reason why?



i luv u before i get close to u...

i luv u before i know u much more...

i luv u because i close to u then her...

i luv u because for me u r so special inside n my sweet talker...

i luv u because u tellin me da truth...

i luv the way u talk..

i luv ur smile..

i luv ur smell...

i luv u been noty..

i luv u when u talk..

i luv u the way u move...

i luv u because i think i know u more then ur bf...

i luv u because i think there's something inside u that need me to be around u n cares for u..

i luv u because i think u need a frend like me beside u...

i luv u because i need u so bad...

i luv u because u r the reason why i can forget my pass..

i luv u because u r the reason why i can smile again..

i luv u because i think i needed by someone...

i luv u because u never fail to make me forgive u when i mad...

but the important thing is... i luv u for the reason who u r...



i luv u syg..gimme chance to be wif u..i dun care bout u n ur bf..coz i already accept u as wut u r..coz i already know that u have a bf but still i cant stop luvin u..also i am different then them rite..so please...think bout it...i want to make it clear..if u r not accept me..then tell me..i try to stop...i will treat u juz like a fren...i juz want to stick wif u..think bout it..take ur time..n tell me ur decision ok...i will wait...i promise never let u hurt..i promise never let u feel lonely...i promise to always make u smile...i promise..i always be ur frend no matter wut happen between us...i promise,never stop taking care of u till u say stop...i promise...if u think u dun need me in ur life...i will disapear..i luv u baby..i do everything i can just to make sure u ok..just to make sure u r safe....so please...believe me..accept me in ur life..as i cant erase u in my life...till u make ur decision..i will wait syg..waiting ur answer..n i never disturd u at that time..if u miss me...need me..luv me..please...give me ur answer..then we work it up...ok..i miss u so much syg..take care...